Motherly Opinions needed: Please leave comments...
The other night, Dan was in Best Buy with ALL 4 kids while I was shopping next door at Ross-(Thanks Dan for the "ME" time) This is what happened when he had the kids:
He took in my laptop to get looked at and within minutes 3 of the 4 kids were in tears; Lanie hurt herself, Cassie wanted out of the cart, and Carson was "trying" to play with the line separators; Dan kept telling him NO...Well, it was crazy and Dan was trying to talk to the customer service guy...Well, so with the kids crying a "BIG" man comes up to Dan and pretty much tells Dan to control his children, "NO ONE wants to hear that in Public" is what he tells Dan. (That is the nice wording) So my question for you is...What would you do???
***(Dan kept his cool, (He wanted to punch the guy, but He didn't want to leave me alone with 4 kids while he was in jail...)I know I would have done something or said something I would have regretted, but Carson throw his shoe at the man as he walked away.***
I have learned that nothing you do as a parent is public is right: In Boise the twins had a melt down to say the least (huh Jenny) while we were in a store; I could have done nothing right; I let them cry and I got the worse stares, BUT if I would have spanked them in public, I would have gotten stares as well...Either way, I couldn't win...
What do you do??? HELP!!!
10 comments:
"thump them" :)
Oh wow - see and that guy would have gotten an earful from me as well!! How are kids going to learn to not be rude in public when there's guys like that around - what an adult...idot!
That being said...
My kids get the "look" ... even Caleb is learning what that means ... going home with a mad mom is not a great option.
Where is bribery on your poll? That's what I do. "If you're good you get to pick out a treat when we are done."
I probably would have been so shocked by this guys rudeness, I would not have even been able to react.
And as tempting as it is to lash back, I think Dan did the right thing. Don't let that guy be the reason your kids see you lose your cool.
This guy obviously either does not have kids, doesn't remember what it's like to have kids, or has kids but isn't the kind of father like Dan is and has never actually watched them by himself.
Did he really think criticizing Dan was going to better the situation? He should have offered him some real HELP. Like anyone wants their children to behave that way.
This actually reminds me of an article in the Ensign with a story about President Kimble and how he responded to a similar situation. After reading that article it has completely changed my perspective on what I should do when I see other parents in the situation.
Love and Logic is my favorite parenting method.
I give my kids the choice before they go into the store, they can go in and behave well or choose to sit in the boring car while I go in and have fun. If they don’t comply with the rules(whatever rules you want), they get to sit in the locked car while I shop all by myself until they decide they’re ready to be obedient. I of course never walk very far away from the car, just out of their sight. Then after they’ve had sufficient time to hate being seat belted in a locked car (or finish thowing their fits) I come back and we try again. “Uh-oh” is the warning they get right before punishment is about to be enforced. That usually is all it takes to get them to remember to be good. We had to take Beau out quite a few times when he was 2 or so but now they know the rules and we don’t usually have problems unless someone’s really tired. So this is what works for us, best wishes!
Um, you and I need to get together online AT THE SAME TIME so we can go over pics, unless you just want me to upload everything I've done. Let me know hobag. Also, I'm going to San Diego tomorrow and the next day with my brother's graduation, and then disneyland next week so we'll figure it out.
Also, I spank my kids a hundred times per day. (I'm a liar, but I totally should.)
First of all... my sister has such nice terms of endearment... (she called you hobag... you are sooo on her top friends list, maybe even higher than me! yeah WHAT?!!)
Second of all... I seriously would have said, "ummmm did I ask you? go bout yo biznessss".
Third of all I give my kids the look too Corina, they know I mean bizness.
I would be SO UPSET if someone told me how to control my children. Why can't people just give you a break every once and a while? I'd want to say something along the lines of "I'm trying my best here," but instead I'd blurt out something like "No one want to HEAR something like that? What about YOU? No one wants to SEE something like that! Big stupid ugly man."
Then I'd be escorted out of the store and my kids would have to give ME the spanking when we got home.
Ok I need to add another 2 cents...so I guess I am up to 4 cents now...IMO - I suppose there is the "times" to take them out of the store - but it has to be to something pretty sucky instead...otherwise I think they "won" that battle. Its possible they don't want to be in the store but TS thats what we are doing for the moment...to me its like church - (and please don't look at me on Sunday) if you take your kids out every time they make noise in the mtgs what have they learned..."if I want to get out of here I just have to make some noise." Kids are very intelligent and if we aren't careful we train them to manipulate us...crazy right!
I have had a few of these moments when Austin was little myself. One of which consisted of a Security Guard detaing us( Austin started to scream for help)
Bottom line people are CRUEL. I have had to develop a thick skin, and understand that I am the best parent I can be with room for improvement.
There are always going to be people out there that can't think SILENTLY! and feel it is their duty that they make sure you do yours..... the #&^$ with them.
I do remember replying to a lady once "If you think you have it figured it out, by all means step in, just be careful his bites hurt
and his swing packs a pretty good
punch."
I think the way Dan answered was AWESOME!.. it probaly made the man more mad, cuz he didn't get the response he intended.
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